Emergency Bikini Body Part III

25 Jun

As we touchdown on the runway of 4th of July week, it’s time to wrap up this party and talk about the very last last last minute tips for a beach body so you can get to the important part: relaxing. (You can read the first parts of the series here and here).

chillax

Day of

Eats

Let’s consider what to eat the night before and morning of your vacation or event.

Google “foods that cause bloat” and you’ll get 866,000 results. That’s what I call info overload. Spend a little time sifting through the advice, you can find basically any and all foods listed at least once somewhere. Even foods that are quite healthy and nutritious can cause bloat if you don’t already eat them frequently. That’s the catch-22: if your diet already has nutritional holes, introducing new things to fill those holes quickly and all at once can cause bloat. That’s why advice to avoid certain foods is kind of a muddy prospect. Ehh…kind of yes and kind of nah.

There’s the usual suspects like cruciferous vegetables (ex: brussels sprouts and cabbage) and beans. Then some say apples and peaches as well (while other sources say they actually stop bloat). Those folks over there say dairy causes bloating.  Then these guys say that high fat foods puff you up due to longer digestion time (while others say the fat-packed avocado is a top flat belly food). Others sources go as far as to say avoid artificial sweeteners, chewing gum, eating fast, and drinking through a straw. In the end, nothing is safe but an IV of black coffee and dandelion greens chewed at a cow’s pace.

That’s pretty silly.

You know your body best. After years of observation I’ve discovered that bread and salt are two of my biggest bloat triggers, so a practical breakfast for me on a beach morning is something like yogurt with berries and a boiled egg, or a banana with natural peanut butter. For someone who has issues with dairy, or with fat, it might be totally different.

Women’s Health has a huge archive of daily eating plans. (Most of them make me depressed and slightly hangry just looking at them, but you’re bound to find examples of meals that avoid whatever your trigger is).

But the number one bloater to avoid?

A large meal.

That’s the only one-size-fits-all solution: just keep meals small and frequent, particularly 1-2 days before you want to look trim, and you’ll be golden.

Elemental Side note: Water or Gas?

If you suffer from bloating and aren’t sure why, do a body check at the end of the day. If your bloat is due to water retention, you would see swelling in the feet and ankles. Reducing sodium intake and drinking more water will help that. If it’s all in the tummy, the culprit is probably gas, which comes from food. Only time and attention can pinpoint what your individual trigger might be.

Plank

Right before you head out to the beach (or step into ya fancy clothes), do 10 push-ups and hold a minute long elbow plank. I confess almost never get to do this step because by the time we’re at this point of readiness there’s generally a swimsuit-clad child jumping on me and whining at the door to go out (is this a preschooler or a puppy?), but when I do there’s a real difference.

Get Up, Stand Up

To look immediately thinner in two steps:

1. Roll shoulders back

2. Pull tailbone forward (tuck hips) without squeezing the tush (check out the first installment in this series for details).

Out of all posture checks, this is the best because it’s how classical dancers are trained to stand (have you seen a ballerina?). It takes practice to stay that way when you’re used to slouching, particularly if you’re a female who is #blessedinthechest, but it’s the fastest, easiest trick in the book. Try it in the mirror. Then try it on the beach and see what happens.

Get in the water!

You’re not doing yourself any favors by sitting or standing by the pool edge, trying to remember to keep it sucked in. Everybody looks cute swimming around like a mermaid (or man – no hate or discriminate). Plus, you’ll automatically be getting more activity into your day.

And One Parting DON’T

As an experiment, I tried a DIY body wrap (anything for my readers). And it was a huge fail. The plastic just bunched up into a thin band and made me itch, plus I lost all the clasps on the ace bandages. Leave it to the professionals, or better yet, ignore that snake oil entirely.

 

So that’s it! The Cushion Cut Beach Body countdown. But just remember the thing the makes you the most attractive on the beach, male, female, young old–is having a good time. Take it from this guy.

Happy Chillaxin.

 

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